no subject;;

the past 3 years ive been overly concerned about my weight.

yeah i know, "why are you complaining? your 5'6 and 120 pounds. chill the fuck out."

but no matter what you say to try to convince me, im always going to be self conscience of my "puge"

but now im thinking about things alittle better.

im talking to a girl right now,
shes 18,
5'8,
and 98 pounds.

if someone had come up to me and told me about this girl, and at first glance at her pictures i would've said "lucky bitch. i wish i had her body" and then would have not ate for the rest of the day.

but after examining her pictures, ive begun to rethink some things.
her thinness isnt as beautiful as i had imagined.
instead of striking and fragile, she just looks sick, boney, and cold.

and i wanted to look like this.
i thought "5'6 and 100 pounds. Perfect!"
but now i see i was alittle off.

tho im still not comfortable with my body, ive finally begun to appreciate my curves and womanly shape.
some girls cant have that at all.

maybe this is a sort of liberation.
i suppose we'll see