yeah im a feminist,

sorry fellas.

a number of things could have caused this:
my moms uber feminism,
her being bi sexual and interacting with lesbians on a day to day basis,
never having a real dad,
having a plethora of fucked up step dads (3 to be exact),
having an alcoholic grandfather,
seeing abuse everywhere,
being abused,
having my own share of asshole boyfriends.

alot huh, so what would you expect?

ive never seen a man do something for a women she couldnt do herself.
or could even do better.

thats what i live by.

i think you need us alot more than we need you

Fairy Tale Dreams,

lets laugh and smile
under baby blue skies.
lets run in cool sand, and splash in foamy waves.
lets play and sing
like children
lets take pictures and make memories
of love and happiness
lets hold on to one another and kiss
under beams of pink and orange
lets sink into eachother
like the sun sinks into the sea.

i feel like screaming

loud.
letting sound rip through my chest.
rip through my soul.

hearts accelerating
head turning,
twirling.
catching glimpses of mid summer nights and pre-thunderstorm dreams.

lungs burning,
bursting.
under cool midnight air.
ears ringing
like the song of a thousand mocking birds.

escape.
release.
a runaway.

collapse.

i feel like screaming.

ooohh-may-guh-low-mayn-eee-ack

half hearted but oh so charming


been singing and humming absent mindedly all day
must be in a good mood.
(mindedly isnt a word)

im in huge need of a hair cut,
hopefully this time they'll get it right so i dont cry.

im starting to realize that some people are more my friends than others.
im getting new friends.
its a fun and interesting thing
=]
ive realized i had stronger feelings for one person
more than i had originally thought at the time.
though it doesnt make much of a difference now.

there are 3 people id like to say i love you too today
=]

im going to north carolina friday,
and im hoping a certain person will go with me.

i need a prom dress.

i need to get over you.
you shouldnt have this power over me

drugs are bad. dont do them. (weed and alcohol are fine however. even shrooms if you feel so obligated)

peer pressure is stupid because it doesnt exist in less you're an idiot.

im a lioness and he looks like a lion and likes felines.
i think thats funny and ironic.

i dont eat very much.
and yet i havent lost any weight.
but i havent gained any either. so its whatever.

this is completely pointless.


Peace<3

for you.

Don't tell me.
You're done for.
I don't need to hear.
You're done for.
You can tell me what you are running from.
I need you,
More than you need you.
I can see you're really really running.
Can I ask you where you gonna run to?
And you think you're really really funny.
well I don't think your funny as you do.
We all feel like we're breaking sometime.
But I won't give you up tonight

Stay awake.
Stay awake survive.
I've got nineteen stars that I,
Gave your name, tonight.
I wanna scream.
Wanna scream your name.
Starlight,
My life can save.
You're my wish tonight.

Don't tell me,
It doesn't matter.
I'll tell you,
What matters.
Bare feet in the summer.
Open windows at night.
You think that no one needs you.
You have nothing to see through.
Well I need you.
No one can catch me,
The way that you catch me.
The way that you keep me when I'm out of time.
What if I need you?
When I can't see you?
And I'm running out of life.

Please...

God,

ive completely lost it.


im officially in full freak out mode.



exactly how bad do you have to get to warrant a hospital stay?
cause im pretty sure im there.

no subject;;

the past 3 years ive been overly concerned about my weight.

yeah i know, "why are you complaining? your 5'6 and 120 pounds. chill the fuck out."

but no matter what you say to try to convince me, im always going to be self conscience of my "puge"

but now im thinking about things alittle better.

im talking to a girl right now,
shes 18,
5'8,
and 98 pounds.

if someone had come up to me and told me about this girl, and at first glance at her pictures i would've said "lucky bitch. i wish i had her body" and then would have not ate for the rest of the day.

but after examining her pictures, ive begun to rethink some things.
her thinness isnt as beautiful as i had imagined.
instead of striking and fragile, she just looks sick, boney, and cold.

and i wanted to look like this.
i thought "5'6 and 100 pounds. Perfect!"
but now i see i was alittle off.

tho im still not comfortable with my body, ive finally begun to appreciate my curves and womanly shape.
some girls cant have that at all.

maybe this is a sort of liberation.
i suppose we'll see

Lets believe in something again..

Starts from the bottom and goes up (note times) :

From: Taylor June. Date: Apr 2, 2008 11:00 PM
your karisma (sp?hehe) helps me put my creativity to good use
instead of focusing on negative things, you help me focus on positive things
i like being colorful and standing outand its time for all the kids that are colorful to come out
im through taking crap from others and from myself
ive never cared for other peoples opinions other than the ones i love
and if they love me they will always support me

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: chelsea. Date: Apr 2, 2008 7:37 PM
you know what you inspire me to be outside of the box.
society demands black and white.
i consider us..colorful compared to them.
and i know we're not the only people like that.
i say we join forces with them and start revolution.
get people to listen to us.
lets not take crap from anyone.
your the only person that gets me.
i'd rather be different and looked down upon by my peers than to sit back and watch my dreams go down the drain because of what people think.

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: Taylor June. Date: Apr 2, 2008 10:30 PM
exactly.
and no matter who you are, everyone feels the same emotions
and what is music but emotions with a beat?
youre the only person i can talk to about this stuff
everyone else is so small minded
life is hard, i know that as much as any 30 year old
but i refuse to think that when im older ill be living a normal life
people like us are meant for so much more
i will take no less than what i dream
id rather die in an adventure, than live in a normal life

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: chelsea. Date: Apr 2, 2008 7:18 PM
yeah cuz the whole world has one thing in common.

music.
everywhere you go you're gonna here a different type of music.

i want to start a revolution
i want to prove to people that i can be somebody.
i want people to come up with a new type of music.
i dont want to be the average rock band.
i dont even want to be considered a rock star.

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: Taylor June. Date: Apr 2, 2008 10:11 PM
my life will simply not be complete unless i go on tour
hopefully with my own band
but even if that doesnt happen, i atleast want to be a guitar tech for a band and go on tour.
i want my name to be on the tips of kids fingers when they talk on message boards.
i want blogs written everytime i change my hair.
i want to be a successful business women
to show the world a girl can belong in the rock music industry on her own
i want to show the world music that could change their life
like the way music has changed mine
i want to make a culture
be the cause of a revolution.
i think music has the power to heal the soul.
i think it might even have the power to heal the world.

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: chelsea. Date: Apr 2, 2008 6:50 PM
i dont want to be famous i just want to tour.
i want a fan base. people that support what i do.
cuz god knows i dont get that at home.
and over all i mean i want to own my own business.
i want to be able to be known to where i can say to my friends who might have a record company,
hey listen to them they're good.
and i want to make a difference in some ones life.
thats what i want to do.
and music is like a stress reliever.
i want to be able to walk down the street and here someone singing a song of ours.
i want to be known.
i want to be a legend.

----------------- Original Message -----------------From: Taylor June. Date: Apr 2, 2008 9:41 PM
lmao=]
yeah tell me about it
why cant we be famous already?haha jk
im not in it for the money
i just want people to know my face when im gone=P